We at the Scandal Press recently came upon t'news that a certain rouge 'aired fopdoodle, did see un chien in t'road and did swerve away and crash a certain jaguar estate (reconstituted mondeo) of a gold colour in t' newly named family tree. We at the Scandal Press, that is me an' t'elf did see this coming along as well as our foreign reporter the currently unbeknown Harsh Reality. "Ha", say we, (in literally translated terms), "gives yer right, shouldn't have been driving so fast in an automobile you never could quite control". The Scandal Press are in complete hysterics over the fact that the said gelogenic jackanapes is now restricted to drive a much smaller, more feminine-appearing, orange car, owned by his elder sister.
Reet, onwards, noo that everyone 'as finished with bein' ahoight an' all, t'is time for the old Scandal Press Standby, (roughly transcripted as: whatever we say goes, despite it being complete bunkum).
Reet, onwards, noo that everyone 'as finished with bein' ahoight an' all, t'is time for the old Scandal Press Standby, (roughly transcripted as: whatever we say goes, despite it being complete bunkum).
So, here goes,
Drumroll please!
Yesterday an arriva bus crashed into the Bolton Crown Court building injuring 4 people, sparking rumours that our red 'aired coxcomb had summat to do with the navigation of this here bus and the police are looking into a definite connection between both incidents.
We have heard news of a pool hustler who goes by the persona Paul Shepley, he has a newfound gift of being a mascot for the game itself, should anyone mutter his name whilst attempting a near impossible shot shall be rewarded with great, otherwise inexplicable, fortune.
thats all folks,
feel free to comment,
The Scandal Press Team
p.s. there is a homunculus fellow in our team that has recently been refered to as an elf, he complains most exhuberantly that he is not an elf but a dwarf, he also claims to conquer all, but seeing as i'm a satrap this will never be possible!
