SCANDAL

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The Monday Issue Shout Out

Thanks for commenting loyal scandal spotters, every comment can help the posting of the next issue.

In response to the worlds most annoying person award, I reinforce my claims that the icing on the cake is complete and Ali has won for the remainder of his life time (which depending upon my sanity may or may not be very shortly). I am sure the person described gnawed at your skull, but I seem to have turned my hearing to the frequency of his voice and now cannot ignore his grasps of annoyance. Conformation of his ceaseless nature to talk came form our mathematics teacher, who revealed that the class Ali is in for maths is so far behind our group solely because of the talking. I doubt anyone you may have met would have had such a detrimental effect on your learning and education. If I can help it, this travesty will end over the easter break with few tears shed over him.

About the lecturers, I'd just like to say how digusted I am to find that they choose to go on strike as if it is expected of them. Why don't teachers ever go on strike just for the hell of it? Why not work on the principle that the longer you work in one place the higher your pay gets? Why does this b*s*a*d government tell us that education is important then let their employees just walk out when they find that thera's money flying around? If they're on strike why should poeple give them more money for wasting this extra money? I DO DECLARE THAT STUDENTS SHOULD GO ON STRIKE AND DEMAND LOWER TUITION!!! It's the only way forward.and it's a great idea, the first step to chaos. The spliting of the generations and government. Violence rules!!

Yours Harshly

Harsh Reality

Much Thrilled Monday Issue

I'd rather not comment about my absence, but the shock of having to restart college beat me into a small box called laziness. It's a pleasure to be writing again despite I fear few comments. The weeks have been fairly uneventful and with the Olympics over there is yet nothing great to watch on TV. The whole of year 12 piled into coaches off to the Gmex in Manchester (a big exhibition centre) for a kick in the backside to consider university options and courses. For those who knew many, if any of the school governers, one Honorary Governer Judge Michael Lever died not but two weeks ago only two days after his second wifes' funeral on Malta. I merely can connect with him through the fact that my Grandparents lived next door to him and both his first and second wife for many years.

I would like to see if you can find a more annoying person than one Ali Altaf. In one very boring and uneventful Physics lesson a few of us decided to engage in the first of it's kind "Ali Tally". A tally of things that this person does to annoy us and how many times he is capable of doing them. The range of tallies incuded: times he laughed for no reason, times he agreed upon something he had no idea about, times spoke in a stupid voice and times he repeated what he just said of something some-one else said. One of the boxes was times he asked a question, and this is just staggering. In 70 minutes he managed a whopping 84 questions, that is 72 questios an hour or 1.2 a minute. this person is a machine of annoyance, it was a god send today what he was not in the lesson. Using our tally he manages 291 annoying things every 70 minutes, even our physics teacher makes jokes about his annoying Irish nature. Oh, did I not mention it he is Irish too, so manages five words a second i.e. speaks really fast. One thing to say to him: "AAAARRRGGGHHH!"

(More detailed analysis at spaces.msn.com/sexypete89/ )

In other news I just like to say that the prices Xcape Leeds Adventure Outdoor Centre are ridiculously scandalous. They manage to blag climbers into paying by the half an hour or hour, I am glad there are sane centres for normal people where you only pay for that day and you can climb for all day if you wish. (Manchester Climbing Centre rocks!!)

I do not know if Kyle's 18th has been and gone yet, but on behalf of the Scandal Press Office and all employees I would like to wish him Happy Birthday and a smiley face.

Yours Sincerely

Harsh Reality